Sunday, 8 April 2012


When someone tells you to give up, and you come across to face the consequences which you think can overcome it and you find out that you aren't that strong to build a strong heart. Realizing it's not the same anymore ,feeling guilty and regret knowing he's not there for you anymore when you need him the most. Life does not threat you fair and you will go "fuck it", wishing there's a time machine to change all things.

During Good Friday, it's the commemorating the crucifixion of Jesus Christ and his death at Calvary. When my cousin,Mark bought me to his church for dinner and also some talk without knowing what was the topic was about at first. It was just an ordinary day for me, to know the brothers and sisters. So, while having dinner there was a pastor giving a speech talk about "Forgive". Why "Forgive"? I got the same question why not having the remembrance of Jesus Christ as a topic for Good Friday instead of "Forgive".

These days, it's hard for people to forgive someone who have hurt them so much and badly. I learned something not just remembering how Jesus loves us so much even though how many people have betrayed him but also the word FORGIVE. It was a very good talk because it makes me realize and flashback what I've done to the person who loved me so much and then BOOM "it's over".

It was a good start happen on the Sep 21st, 2010 and now, I'm looking for an answer to the question HOPE? still there?. Well, I don't know. Time comes and flies if you don't get them, you lost it but who knows miracles comes right? To make myself more optimistic over the things that is ugly enough, I always hope for the best he will come back. (Laughs) I know this is stupid but knowing he's not just a normal guy, any other guy who will have the patience to wait for someone who is not worth waiting. He did, he waited and i ruined just because being too naive. Yes, I am when I was being immature. Okay, this is embarrassing but don't tell me you never tried before.

Sighed*. A lot of memories is still pulling me back even though I thought I have already give up. Guess I have not. I did the most dumbest thing is to unfriend him in Facebook, cause' I got enough viewing his profile and his posts it's always telling me that there's somehow a related. It drives me crazy every time when I read his post. It's stupid and tears are always ready to fill up a pile. So, I make the decision just to unfriend him and I guess I can't forget him much. I really missed him a lot and feelings are still there.

Thinking about is it time to give up or not?
When you really love someone, will you give up?

Should I? I guess just wait and see what's the answer then.

Monday, 19 December 2011

story begin like this

Finally, I have the time to do whatever i want. Having 3 weeks of holidays before 2nd semester start it's good but miss the fun time with all my friends. They really do make you feel "college sick" which makes you want to go back to college to see them. Although it's just the first semester with them but it feels like i've know them for a very long time. This is during our public speaking presentation for christmas.

See how crazy are we :D

And this is my group of barbarian people that acted in Last Christmas.

After that day, 3 of us (may foong, cherry & i) were having 2 hectic and tired day to work as a crew at Magacon in KDU University College. It was fun to work and also play at the same time :D. But, if you are sick and ill, you don't feel comfortable at all..

CTC crew member  :)

The participants

 Nerf !!!

MaGacon banner


Even Red FM DJ Jeremy Teo was there to play the game.
He's way good looking if you see him like FACE to FACE :D

Cosplay :)

There are a lot of games at MaGacon. For instance, Kinect Xbox 360, Magic, Pac man, Board games, Nerf... so much more... TO GO!!!!..

Tuesday, 22 November 2011

experimenting LOVE?

- Kiss on the Forehead: We're cute together .
- Kiss on the Cheek: We're friends.
- Kiss on the Hand: I adore you.
- Kiss on the Neck: I want you now.
- Kiss on the Shoulder: Your perfect.
- Kiss on the Lips: I LOVE YOU.

- Holding Hands: We definitely like each other.
- Holding you tight pressed against each other: I want you.
- Looking into each other's Eyes: I like you, for who you are.
- Playing with Hair: Let's fool around.
- Arms around the Waist: I like you too much to let go.
- Laughing while Kissing: I am completely comfortable with you.

- If you were thinking about
someone while reading this,
you're definitely
in Love.

-Put this as your status after
Or you will have a bad year of

- and can't get them out of your
- then put this as your status
within One Minute and Whoever
you are missing will surprise you

I got this message from my friend and yeah i do think of it .. it's common to think..
but wondering.. it is true?? well, to me.. i don't think it means that way..
every gesture does have meanings but those meanings only you will know what does it means..

it sucks a lot when someone you like a lot or you have strong feelings with does that to you and you have no idea what he/she means..CERTAINLY IT IS.. you wouldn't know what he/she thinking but you, yourself create a meaning which also leads to misunderstanding.. stupid isn't it?? i agree it is..
we always hope and wish for the best not for the worst.. we wish miracle does happen your way but it doesn't when there's no fate at all.. if you don't live for something, you will die for nothing.. SO! move your life and live for something that is worth it..

PS: don't relay on something but your own trust.

Friday, 28 October 2011

Confessions from a DISORDER LIFE well only TODAY.

yeah, "what the hell" seriously after having a jail-conversation with my mom.

It's pretty like PRETTY pathetic how the way she thinks when she questions me. She doubted me that doing assignments and coursework will take A LONG TIME! Hello!! like duhhh..
It's not ABC or 123 it's call working your brains off with all the works. Gawd!!..

This may be childish because I am complaining how stupid it is. Sorry, but i can't help it how the way she scolded me and nagged me. It bugged my head (explode)!!! when she called me "stupid" .. why stupid?? Because you have no brains to think how easy to finish it ..
ANSWER without a good fact(perhaps).  How can it be easy to finish??? then here comes her grandma stories about her studies in Canada.

Once upon a time, she can work under pressure whenever her lecturer gave her work by timing like 24 hours you got to finish then you have to time up yourself and finish by then.
I gave a wide smile and bravo!! amazing (thumbs up). In my mind, why are you boasting yourself??

OH, one thing about me or more.
a) people giving you fake HOPE.
b) boastful how great they are. (we know by ourself without you telling.)
c) "promise" here, "promise" there, always "LIES" everywhere.
d) playing people around like a puppeteer.
e) thinking he/she only rule this world.

there's more but depends what things trigger me then i will "BLOW" :D.

so yeah, get back to where I've stopped.
it really turn off my mood for weekends when she said that. i know i am not as good and experience than you but give and take. it's not like i will burn the modem immediately.
and YES, i'm as slow as a snail that takes forever to go on life.AND!!! one thing she did this like ALL THE TIME!!!

Today(yesterday) 28/10/2011.

WOOT!! went Central Market with my aunts then walk to College.
This is Central Market,

since 1888. If you like batik and crafts, this is a nice place to "pay" a visit.
Not the real pay with cash because a batik there cost you around RM 200 and more. So, if you happen to shop there, bring more cash :) !!!..

While walking fast to college (because Cherry did not bring her Student ID and couldn't get in to the Library), then there's where fun begins :).
The half of the day of class was amazing(to me)..  why?? I overcome my sorrow, I actually did it. He still "running" inside my mind  STILL but after that day he proves me that his hopes was not "exactly" sincere. And I start with this quote 

" Don't judge a book by it's COVER, until the cover it's on FIRE".

What does it means? It means don't judge by appearance and just fall for tiny little acts (you may be on the way to the "HOLE" of uncertain feelings), until the TRUTH is reveal by the nature of himself/herself.
 David Hume says " Mind puts things together & construct false ideas".
I was like that at first and it gave me wrong statement(REALLY WRONG). And after knowing the truth, starting on I was like this
being emotional and expecting the good than the bad.
and slowly I thanked(in my heart) him because

for he's "answers" by letting me know what kind of person he is.

And my mind tells me this .....

makes me realize that...
 and now i'm a 
 because I have to finish up my 2 english coursework with 4000 words, microeconomics coursework + presentation ,philosophy (don't mention HOW many) ,one biology (syphilis) folio and prove my mom wrong that I CAN DO IT!! in your face.. BLEH..

Good Night Bloggy! XOXO.

Have a great weekend and enjoy this few song by

1)Kaskade - Eyes


2) Journey - After All These Eyes

3) Pitbull Feat Marc Anthony - Rain It Over Me (dedicate to Cherry Lam Siew Wen)

4) Marc Anthony - Sang To Me.

Sunday, 16 October 2011

a word FUN

It was last week Wednesday when my public speaking class was cancelled,we (Aaron, Sharon, Soo Fen, Cherry,May Foong and I) went to Time Square just for a drink.  I was like WOAW! Time Square it's just the perfect place to shop for clothes!!!!!! it's so much cheaper than One Utama, Curve (depends which clothes departments you are talking about). It will drive you nuts somehow. 360 degrees of CLOTHES. Okay, enough with that . LAUGHS*

We were walking up and down just to find a great place for a drink/food. Sharon listed out the restaurants/cafe in Time Square. We all laughed at her because she can help Time Square be the directionist :P. And FINALLY!!! we went SHARE TEA. The drinks are mostly or I should sat all are BUBBLE TEA :D. It's nice and this is what we got for our tea session.


after drinking session,
we all went for camwhoring..
it's fun.. we never thought it can't be this fun 

our next round is JOGOYA :)

Thursday, 13 October 2011



PS: You're turning OLD already.


He's Brian Loh and another photographer with amazing pictures. This is his tumblr and check out his photos.
Although it's just a few pictures. But, it's beautiful like this :-